Things moved forward. I graduated high school, went off to college, and waited for my life to begin.
I don't know what exactly I was waiting for! Marriage or something, I suppose... Well, relationships came and went, so did semesters, so did everything else.
I can't remember when the idea of serving a mission popped into my head. I know I didn't entertain it for long. That was NOT POSSIBLE. I was not one of "those" girls. That was the last thing I wanted. And more than anything, I couldn't leave my dog! So I dismissed the thought and went on my way.
I wished shelving the idea could have been so easy. It was like a rock stuck in my Vans that I couldn't get out. But I kept it to myself in hopes that it would go away.
It didn't go away.
I prayed, read scriptures, prayed some more in hopes for a clear "no, you're not supposed to serve a mission". It never came. Finally, I decided to put my fears aside and really find out.
It was a Monday in October of 2010. I woke up early for class and opened my fast with a prayer seeking a clear direction. I went to my "Teachings of the Living Prophets" class and waited for it to begin. Everyone began finding their seats, but before we started the teacher paused from mingling, walked to the front of the classroom and said,
"It really drives me crazy that we don't give more credit to the sister missionaries. If any of you girls are even considering a mission, just go. We need you."
I looked up at the ceiling and thought in my mind,
"Maybe God, MAYBE that was an answer."
Class went on as normal and afterwards I began to walk alone toward the Rexburg temple. If there was anywhere I knew I would receive an answer it would be there. I waited in the chapel for temple baptisms and felt absolutely nothing. Whew, home free! Not quite...
It was almost my turn to be baptized. I quitely opened my scriptures to the Doctrine and Covenants. I can't even remember where I turned are what the reference would be; all I know is that it was loud and clear that God gave me the answer "yes" and expected me to follow.
The next several hours went by in a daze. After the temple I immediately walked home and made an appointment to meet with my BYU-Idaho bishop. I said,
"Bishop, I don't really want to do this." He said,
"Well, you don't have to." I said,
"Yes...yes I do. Let's get started." And we began the process of applying to serve a mission.
Now, something you have to know about me: I do NOTHING without consulting with my mother first. She knows the ins and outs of my life like no one else. So, the fact that I had made a gigantic life decision without her scared me to absolute death.
Holding back tears, I left the bishop's office and ran to my car. 2 minutes later I parked in front of my Rexburg apartment and speed diled my mother.
"I just left the bishop's office. I started my mission papers. Im really scared. I dont think I can leave for 18 months. What if something happens to my dog? What if I don't ever get married? I dont even know if this is the right decision. What am I supposed to do?"
The other end of the phone was silent for a few seconds. "Are you sure?" was really the only response I got back. But there was no denying that it was right.
So from October to December I completed my mission application with the most determined force I could muster. There were bumps, bruises, some blood i think, and lots of tears along the way; but, those papers were sent in whether they liked it or not.
Almost exactly 1 year ago, on New Years Eve, that big white envelope of destiny showed up in my mailbox.
...
"...you are called to serve in the Tennessee Nashville Mission speaking english... You will report to the Mission Training center on April 13, 2011".
And here I am.
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